How 'real' is your reality?

I have a love-hate relationship with philosophy. Some of the concepts really fascinate me. I love the freedom of thought, the wondering about life and the making sense of things. To an extent, I admire philosophers for their strength of character in a willingness to question and explore.

But then, I look at all the philosophies that take us so far from God. Some are mere babble, and are interesting because they can be laughed at. But others are so dangerously close to the truth that for the person who is unsure of himself, his purpose and his beliefs, it looks to BE the truth and the lie becomes indistinguishable. These philosophies are tricky, tricky. Leading the unwary to fall into the same pit that bore them. I think sometimes that God must abhor these types of philosophies – leading children to a fall before they have even begun to walk.

I recently read a piece of philosophy – where and what will remain unnamed – that stated that there is no such thing as objective reality; only our subjective view on reality. Thus saying, there is no person that knows the whole, objective truth. We all colour reality through our experiences and bias. To an extent I do agree. We are so fallible and so feeble. It takes only one person with superior reasoning skills or a higher IQ who forms a persuasive argument to make us doubt ourselves and change our point of view. What is that popular quote? – History is written by the victors. The predominant theory of our time writes the history and gets labelled as “truth”. The world’s truth changes every few decades or so...

Where are we to stand then? How do you decide which philosophy to follow, which theory to ascribe to?

For me, it has become simple. I will follow the only absolute truth I know: the Word of God. It will be a measure against which I measure all others. True, we as humans cannot be objective. Only the Almighty can claim to be truly objective, to truly see the matter as it is. We cannot possibly be able to comprehend all the facets of every matter, both physical and spiritual. But He can. And so, clinging to Him becomes the only option. When we wonder, when we doubt, we need only ask. He knows the consequences of every single action and the motivation behind every single thought. He is the only one who can see both sides of each story, because He is the ultimate truth against which it will be weighed.

Accepting this, we can be confident of our actions even when they don’t make sense to the world at large. “What? Forgive my enemies? Bless those that curse me? How absurd!”

“Give away TEN percent of my money? You’ve got to be kidding!”

“Rest one day out of seven? I don’t have time for that!”

It makes no sense, but He can see the outcome of every action. The deeper impact that we cannot hope to see with mere physical eyes. There is a real world behind this one – our life, our reality is merely a shadow. How can we hope to know what our actions do if we cannot see past this realm? There is only one way and that is by following His Word. The ultimate guide to the universe, I’d say.

Revelation

Amazing, amazing. The more you learn, the more you realise how completely awesome, terrifying and beautiful God is. He is complete in Himself, sovereign, and yet He cares for such a one as me. Thinks of me as beautiful and worthy to be His bride...

I'm listening to a teaching by Paul Washer entitled, quite aptly, The Greatness of God. He is explaining how powerful, how amazing God is. Do you realise that He has the whole world in his hand? That He is in complete control? There is nothing that you can do or that can happen that He has not forseen or is not in control of. Our God is a mighty God to be feared and loved. But what's more... think of yourself as a slave. Think of slaves in days gone by. What did they worry about? The only thing they worried about was doing the will of their master. They didn't worry about food - it was their master's job to feed them. They didn't worry about clothes - he dressed them as he wished. The only thing they concerned themselves with was making sure they did they will of their master.

How much more should we be the same? We know this God - he merciful, slow to anger, abounding in love... such a good God, not giving us what we deserve and more than we could ever ask for. Not a human master with fickel moods and a temper. WHY do we worry about trivial things? ALL we need worry about is how to please our master. He promises to take care of everything else. He is completely, fully in control.

Let me share another anology Paul Washer used. Look at a little child. He doesn't worry about food - his father will make sure that lunch is ready when it needs to be. He doesn't worry about anyone hurting him - his father will sort them out. Such faith in a limited, human man. How much more can we expect this from our God? We don't need to worry about one, single thing other than pleasing God. Nothing, nothing, nothing.

In Love Again

What an amazing feeling... to fall in love again. It's amazing when you find Someone to love, and the more you learn about Him the more you fall in love. You find yourself thinking about Him all the time. Even when you are busy, you'll suddenly realise your thoughts have drifted towards Him again. But it's OK and you know it's safe. You can sink deeper into this feeling and let yourself go. Because there are no negative consequences and no regrets.

Falling into His arms, I feel safe. The more I learn, the more I realise how faithful He is. Amazing how He can love me; amazing the priviledge I have to love Him back. His words are true - He never goes back on His word. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. He has no fickle moods. So I know the things I learn will be just as true today as they were 20 years ago. He is constant. A rock to rely on, air to breathe, water to enfold.

I am getting addicted to this dance and the great thing is that there is no shame in it. The only infatuation on earth that makes you more and better the longer you are addicted. No one can lure me away, no one can take me from His arms. He is mine and I am His.

Just thinking

Feeling pensive today. Have been feeling this way for weeks now. Or should I say I've been musing for weeks? Thinking about life, about choices we make, about where we are now. Started thinking about all the things I would change if I could go back in time and make different choices. But that's a road best not traveled on.

Some days I feel like I get stuck in the dream. I fantasize about another time, another life and other possibilities. Then I open my eyes and long for that reality. How can you miss a place you've never been to? Hmm. I suppose I have been there... in my dreams.

Perhaps this is my own special little form of escapism. Perhaps not the most productive habit of all, but most days I can't bring myself to care about that. I feel like I have something inside me, a large-ness, a potential, and this is the only way to let it out.

For the things I miss

So far away from where you are
These miles have torn us worlds apart
And I miss you, yeah I miss you

So far away from where you are
I'm standing underneath the stars
And I wish you were here

I miss the years that were erased
I miss the way the sunshine would light up your face
I miss all the little things
I never thought that they'd mean everything to me
Yeah I miss you
And I wish you were here

I feel the beating of your heart
I see the shadows of your face
Just know that wherever you are
Yeah I miss you
And I wish you were here

I miss the years that were erased
I miss the way the sunshine would light up your face
I miss all the little things
I never thought that they'd mean everything to me
Yeah I miss you
And I wish you were here

So far away from where you are
These miles have torn us worlds apart
And I miss you, yeah I miss you
And I wish you were here

The Bucket List

So not to long ago I watched a movie called 'the bucket list'. In essence, things to do/see before you kick the bucket. Very poetic :P. But the idea had merit - a lot, actually. It made me think of all the things I want to do and see before I shuffle off this mortal coil. It is inspiring and depressing all at the same time. Inspiring - because my dreams are big. Depressing because I am no closer to doing any of these things than I was 10 years ago. But maybe if I have them down somewhere, I will actually work towards getting to the items on my list. So here goes, this is my bucket list in no particular order:

1. Fly in a hot air balloon (champagne breakfast optional :P)
2. See the aurora borealis first-hand
3. Ride on a dog-sled (possible in conjunction with point 2)
4. Play in snow
5. Visit Disney World in America
6. Visit Greece
7. Visit Scotland
8. Visit the Grand Canyon
   
9. Visit an exotic island and watch sunset on the beach
10. Hold my own baby in my arms
11. Ride a camel
12. Stand on a large sand dune (namibia or egypt)
13. Write a successful book
14. Own a new car, out of the box (a nice one, not a kia or hundai :P)
    
15. Swim with dolphins

That's it for now. Maybe I'll ad some more items later. Plenty to work towards already ;)

Tae Boy that hurts...

I got dragged off to a Tae Bo class by a friend this week. Man, it's a lot tougher than it looks on youtube... My very first day in class, I worked hard and tried to keep up with the instructor. I sweated more than I have sweated this entire summer (how unladylike of me!) and about 15min into class I felt like I was going to throw up. Apparently this is a sign that I am doing it right. A bit puzzling, since throwing up is usually not desirable... oh well!

The next day, my back and legs are so tired. Not sore, just exhausted. I felt like they were saying 'go on without us!'. Even sitting at my desk was a mission and a half. The day after that was archery. One of my arrows rebounded off the butt and I had to bend to pick it up - owww! Man, my thighs were killing me! And that night it was back to the torturer, I mean Tae Bo class.

But, wonder above wonders, class number 2 was a little bit easier. I didn't feel like throwing up and even though I still sweated like a slave (thanks to a friend of ours for this gem), I could do a lot of the class without taking a break or passing out. Amazing! I actually felt invigorated afterwards. I left class feeling like I had accomplished something.

Sure I can't do all the moves yet, but I do try my best. There is a second instructor that comes around to help you with moves that are too advanced. I can say one thing for sure - this is not like some internet get-fit-quick scam. When you are in that class, you know without a doubt that ever muscle in your body is getting the fat kicked out of them! It is hard work, but I always suspected that there are no easy routes to a healthy, slim body. You've got to just suck it up and submit to the torture! Which turned out to be kind of fun reallly :).

I'm not one for New Year's resolutions per se, but here's to a size 36 bod by December 2012. Man now I hope the world doesn't really end on the 21st...

My Body is a Cage

One of my new favourite songs - I could listen to it over and over and I have - is "My Body is a Cage" by Arcade Fire. Why do I like it? Well, I do like the genre, but the major thing is the words. Words are very important to me - I don't just sing along to a song. I have to know what's being said and I have to agree. The chorus of this song:

My body is a cage that keeps me
From dancing with the one I love
But my mind holds the key

I sometimes catch myself walking through the house just singing those lines, over and over. It makes me think of our walk with God. The more I get to know Jesus, the more I realise that our whole life here is like a dance, a beautiful, romantic dance with the creator of the universe. The dance is where we learn to trust our 'partner', let Him lead, and finally just to let go and enjoy life. He takes us on sudden turns, exhilirating whirls and through steps we didn't think we could handle. But we make it. And it is beautiful. But sometimes it feels like the music is just turned down too low, or we seem to get interrupted too often. There's something in the way. Usually the world; either things we love above Him or people mocking our passion...

I'm living in an age
That laughs
When I'm dancing
With the one I love
But my mind holds the key

Well... didn't Paul say we see now as through a glass darkly, but then we will see clearly? That's how I feel then about this romance, this dance that is Christianity. Life, this human body, keeps me from dancing with Him the way I want to, from experiencing Him the way I want to.

Sometimes I cry thinking about it. But it is a bittersweet ache. This body is a cage that keeps me from dancing with the One I love, the One who loves me... We never get to do the whole dance here. Just a few steps, now and then. Just enough to make me long for more. But one day, one day the dance will be danced in all its splendour.

For now, I see the dance in my mind's eye. And I am so happy when I'm dancing with Him. But I weep when the dance is cut short. My body is a cage, set my spirit free, set my spirit free...

20 Yards!

So last year I started going for archery lessons. It's something I've wanted to do most of my life - I could just never find a class close to home. I finally found a place and it feels like... destiny! Haha, very dramatic I know, but sometimes it's like you just know that you were made to do something. I cannot describe the feeling... well, I can try :)

It's somewhere between sheer joy and empowerment. Holding that bow up makes you feel powerful and capable. It is such a unique feeling, that there really is nothing like it in the world. You have to pick up a bow once in your life and just experience the weight and the feel of it in your hands. And then when you draw it out - wow, pure magic. Like the world holds its breath at that whisper-soft sound of the string drawing tight. Of course the best is yet to come. You hold for 3 seconds, carefully taking aim and then release. Pure joy as you feel the power of the string move that arrow and you hear a perfect thud! on the target. Ah, there is nothing like it :)

Wow, I distracted myself. My point was that yesterday class started up again for 2012. I got to shoot 20 yards for the first time. Quite proud of myself - I shot it without a sight and I'm doing pretty ok. Now I am just waiting for the lovely Hoyt bow we ordered in Nov 2011 to actually get here. Then I shall kick ass and take names :P

Is this thing on?

I've forgotten that I even had this blog... but a good friend of mine is such an avid blogger that I recently got reminded of it. It seems cathartic and somewhat liberating to blog, from what I can tell. So hopefully this will be the first post of many.